No matter how much you play it down, spending the Christmas holidays with someone else’s family is a humongous step, especially if it's your new spouse’s family. The dynamic remains even tenser if both sides of the in-laws are brought together for Christmas.

Personally, we thought of Christmas holidays earlier in our marriage when we had to spend time with in-laws before we developed our own family traditions. The nerves, anxiety and walking on eggshells trying to master the delicate balancing act of being our real selves with being sensitive to grown people you’ve just met. You feel you often have to hold back your honest opinions about issues like politics, religion, culture and other polarising subjects — even when you’re challenged to offer your views...