No sleep for skinner during silly season

IT'S the summer of celebration and we all know that at this time of year sleeping is a no-no for non-stop party-goers like your Skinnerbek! My party duties for the week began at the PE Opera House last Thursday for a stage production on our mayor Oom Ben Fihla's life. Oom Ben was accompanied by his wife, Ntombizodwa, and their grandkids. It was quite emotional seeing the number of people who came to watch the play – even I shed a tear when I learnt about his contribution to the struggle.

The play will be back at the Opera House in March next year, so look out for it, as it was rather good and the actors and actresses did a splendid job.

After the play we had a mini after-party at the same venue, where a rather worse for wear Keebo Madjodina got my attention quite simply because she was the loudest. I had to ask who she was and discovered that, donkeys' years ago, she played a nurse in the flagging SABC1 soapie Generations. Seeing no one was paying her any attention she opted to sleep in her chair.

On Friday I made my way to the Feather Market Centre for Oom Ben's Living Legend gala dinner. The grand old dame (I mean the venue here) was beautifully dolled up though those fairy lights on the roof were a little odd.

There were some scary outfits too. Shame, one woman went for pleather on pleather. Really now, in this heat? Councillor Nomajama Benya also needs help in the fashion department – she looked like she was taking part in a drag show.

And shame, the lady sitting next to tourism's Mandlakazi Skefile Iooked like she had something sprouting from her head, only it was a weave with a life all of its own. If you had the misfortune of sitting behind her she'd have obscured your entire view of the stage.

As for council speaker Maria Hermans – she put her worst foot forward in a pair of hideous shoes that cut off her leg just below the ankle, giving her the dreaded kankle.

Most guests (including yours truly in a sexy Heinz number) did however show up in fabulous gear. Host (or "programme director", as it is known in these circles) Theo Klaas looked suave in white dinner jacket with touches of black, while Seki Mandaba was the epitome of grace in a halter-neck chiffon black-and-white dress worn with beautiful heels. Noxolo Nqwazi was in a mint-green tent dress and should rather have chosen a dress that embraces her curves. Honey, this is Africa, if you've got it, flaunt it!

Entertainer Malizole has a good voice but should stick to singing instead of talking halfway through his performance.

The food from Bojangles was tasty though you could not cut into the chicken without it moving in the opposite direction. The Feather Market cutlery needs an upgrade too – and did I mention there was no bar? We were served non-alcoholic sparkling something. I know times are lean but I'd have been happy to bring my own dora.

On Saturday my top stop was the Nelson Mandela Bay Stadium for the HSBC World Sevens series, thanks to an invite from the municipality. People dressed up in fun outfits and many a gal (count me in!) was seen drooling over those hot players.

Next was the Metro FM HeatWave at Cubana, swarming with scores of super cool artists – and some less-than-cool guests. Pakes, of Ndizalelwe ebhayi, told everyone who cared to listen that he is the only one who has swag. He was so loud he could have woken the dead and at 2am had the audacity to tell people how they should dress.

Some guests obviously got comps and were enjoying the free booze so much that they passed out, mouths wide open, in the VVIP lounge. Now that's just hashtag swagless!

Roland and Shahnaz Williams's sweet little angel, Isla Rhayne, celebrated her first birthday on Reconciliation Day. Guests were treated to a party of note at Georgiou Hotel and Spa, which was teeming with tiny tots and their fashionista parents.

There were gold tiffany chairs, white roses with angel wings, and angel motifs aplenty in keeping with the angel theme.

Attorney Phumeza Bija-Bono wore a lemon yellow and white dress with black-and-white heels, while businesswoman Glenda Perumal rocked a white linen dress with colourful jacket. Isla Rayne's dad donned a white shirt with navy slim-fit pants and brown Louis Vuitton belt, while mom wore an LBD with red sling-back flats – you have to be practical with a one-year-old around.

I later headed to the beachfront to celebrate the opening of the festive season at Hobie Beach, where DJ Spectrum took us to another world. AKA, later joined by DA Les, also gave a stunning performance, though I was disappointed when AKA refused to take pics with his fans in the VIP area.

Before I sign off for the week, I simply must commend Councillor Marion Harning on finally getting her hair "sorted".

She was so chuffed with her new look that she even sent Skinnerbek a selfie showing off her newly-coiffed do – check it out on this page!

• Don't miss The Herald's Christmas edition on Wednesday for the Skinnerbek Awards, when we bring you the biggest posers, the most memorable moments, and the chicest, silliest and smarmiest movers and shakers of 2014!