Honour women's role all year round
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT, respect, admiration, appreciation and valuing fellow human beings must be a continuous mindset that is programmed in our daily interactions, not only to dedicate August as a month for women. Every day must be dedicated to a life of synergy and compassion for each other.
From a biological and natal perspective, women are different from men. With regard to intelligence, wisdom, competencies and potential, no man can proclaim that men hold an upper hand over women.
At all times, as men, we must internalise and endorse a way of life that values and accepts women as our equals in all domains of life.
I was so bewildered and upset the other day when listening to a television programme on the wide-ranging levels of women abuse. The research analyst stated some men abused women because they feel they had lost control over women.
I asked myself: how could you lose what you did not have because no man had control over a woman.
To me, women abuse can be, to some extent, attributed to men feeling the trajectory of how women have progressed in empowering themselves. This does not settle well with some men.
This is pure and simple an inferiority complex. In many forms of human interaction, perceptions of inferiority can lead to aggression and paranoia.
Eventually, in these situations, anger that leads to physical aggression becomes some form of redemption to some men.
There are beliefs about women's incapability to perform effectively in some domains that are perceived to be "traditionally" a territory of men. These types of beliefs and perceptions may be harsh and destructive for the confidence and esteem of some women.
However, the consolation is that some resolute women will not be discouraged by what some men with chauvinistic, bigoted and blinkered egos think about them. These are women who are driven to be victors instead of being victims.
These are women whose life's purpose is to stand up and be counted. Such women are beacons and icons of toughness and durability.
These are women who will never ask for approval from anybody to attain and accomplish what has to be achieved. Some men's egos tend to be threatened by such women. Durable and incisive women are what the world needs right now. Incisive and knowledgeable women do not exhibit their expertise and abilities in August only.
In some circles, we get some men who unfortunately perceive and believe that superiority from masculinity is culturally derived.
This notion is without scruples, objectivity and logic.
It may be quite a monumental challenge to reposition the psyche of chauvinistic men to accept that women are also insightful and shrewd contributors to this world. Therefore, we need to tackle the root problem by introducing the facilitation of programmes and regular interventions, to inculcate the younger generation with correct principles of human interaction at an early age. These programmes must uphold and have an impact on influencing a character of empathy and respect for each other and as such must bring out the following qualities:
- Seek first to understand than be understood;
- Understand the win-win paradigm;
- Diversity in interpersonal relations;
- Coexistence applying emotional intelligence;
- A universal concept of human rights.
Many countries (South Africa included) and their corporates support sport that is played mainly by men. I was shocked to establish that a popular sport like netball does not enjoy the same sponsorship (if at all) as men's rugby, men's soccer and men's cricket.
The other institutionalised false and absurd notion of male superiority over women is in politics.
There are women who have radiantly and courageously taken strides in business and society. Such women can easily be role models to even aspiring young men.
These are women who are courageous, resilient and able change agents. Among others are Nomboniso Gasa, Wendy Luhabe, Graca Machel, Andy Kawa and Cheryl Carolus.
If recognition of each other can be disseminated into everybody's consciousness at an early age, we could be producing appropriate conduct for those who are still growing. This appropriate conduct may also impact on curbing social ills like women abuse, rape, etc. We definitely need a mindset transformation for our societies.
Now that August, which is "supposedly" women's month, is over, are you, as a man, going to esteem and continue to honour women the way they are supposed to be honoured? It is our responsibility as men to carry this baton of embracing the value of women.
Upholding this baton is a recipe for good interpersonal relations. It is to the benefit of everybody, and a win-win for men and women simultaneously.
Julian Ngcangca, Port Elizabeth
