Boy survivor’s uncertain future

[caption id="attachment_129630" align="aligncenter" width="500"] TERRIBLE TRAGEDY: Patrick Sithole carries his sleeping grandson away from mourners at the boy’s home in Motherwell. Mourning family and church members came to the house for a service after Sithole’s two daughters and grandson were murdered by his son-in-law, who then turned his gun on himself[/caption]

Custody dispute over child whose parents, brother and aunt died in murder-suicide

A THREE-YEAROLD boy slept soundly in his grandfather’s arms as dozens of people came to pay their respects at the house where his father gunned down his mother, brother and aunt – before turning the weapon on himself.

Oblivious to what was happening around him, the boy, whose name is known to Weekend Post, wrapped his arms around his grandfather Patrick Sithole’s neck while church members filled their front yard, singing songs and praying for the family on Thursday.

Two families came together to mourn last week’s brutal incident that left them shocked and heartbroken. Gabula Gaqa, 49, shot his wife, Nandipha, 32, their older son, Cwenga, 6, and Nandipha’s sister, Zizipho Sithole, 27, before shooting himself in NU29, Motherwell.

Cwenga, who was wounded severely, was rushed to hospital after neighbours alerted emergency services, but died the next morning.

The three-year-old boy escaped the violent attack when his mother, Nandipha threw him through a closed glass window, into the front garden, seconds before Gabula shot her.

Disputes over funeral arrangements and custody over the young boy marred the families’ mourning process in the past week. Gabula’s family wanted his wife and son to be buried with him near his family home in Peddie, while Nandipha’s family refused, due to Gabula’s hand in their deaths.

By Thursday, with the help of officials from the Department of Social Development, the two families were able to reach an agreement. Gabula will be buried in Peddie, while his wife and son will be buried with Nandipha’s sister near Port Elizabeth.

“It was a long and difficult process, with many arguments going back and forth, but we came to an agreement that we feel will be best for everyone involved,” Dumisa Lutshetu, a member of Nandipha’s family, said.

Both funerals will take place next weekend, but on different dates so that family members can attend both ceremonies. “We are extremely grateful to the Department of Social Development for their intervention and their assistance in resolving this matter peacefully.

Now our families can mourn in peace,” Lutshetu said. Speaking shortly before Thursday’s mourning service, Gabula’s cousin, Ludwe Nikelo, 49, said he was still coming to terms with the loss of his “brother” and what had happened.

“We grew up together. As boys we would always go swimming together, play together or have play stick-fights. Even now, as adults, we spent much time together. Our families were close.

I have all these fond memories of Gabula. He was always a peaceful and gentle person,” Nikelo said. “No one expected this thing to happen. Something must have reached boiling point. We have so much regret over what happened.

We have nothing but remorse and sympathy for Nandipha’s family, because they are our family too.”

He also thanked the department for stepping in “when tensions were high” between the families. Neither family commented on the custody dispute over the boy, saying only that the matter was ongoing.

In the meantime, concern about the boy’s wellbeing is growing, despite visits to a psychologist for counselling this past week. His grandfather’s sister, Nolita Qalinge, said he did not seem to understand what had happened.

However, he appeared to have some recollection of what transpired that day. “Over the past few days, when he is playing outside, he makes a gun with his fingers and points it at people walking past,” Qalinge said.

“The other day, out of the blue, he asked my niece, ‘Do you want to be shot?’ “Then he replied himself, ‘I don’t want to be shot.’ Where else could he have learned that? This incident has obviously had an affect on him.”

Qalinge’s daughter, Ziyanda, who took the boy to the psychologist this week, said he was unresponsive when asked about the incident.

“Whenever the doctor asks him if he can remember anything, he just plays with the toys the doctor gave him. He shows no interest in speaking about that day,” Ziyanda said.

Qalinge and Ziyanda said his counselling would continue, and they hoped it helped him to deal with the events of the previous weekend.