Eleanor Douglas-Meyers is a crafty mom from Uitenhage who writes about DIY, parenting, natural hair care, fashion, food and fun on her blog JustEllaBella. Today she looks at the mixed messages we get on parenting.
Being a mom is much more difficult than I expected. Honestly those baby dolls and strollers we had as kids did absolutely nothing to prepare us for the real minefield – or should that be mind-field? – that is parenting.
This is why I’m considering not speaking to my kid anymore.
I’m just getting such mixed messages from social media and well-meaning people and various articles. I thought this might be the best way to not screw him up.
Because you know complimenting them too much makes them not strive for better. Not complimenting them enough makes them underachieve.
You should let them find the answers to things themselves, to promote learning. But since you don’t want them getting incorrect answers you need to guide them by teaching them.
You should not mention their physical appearance as it can breed narcissism. But you must build their self esteem on both physical and intellectual level.
You should let them have free play and no screen time while interacting with them. But you should guide them with educational games and also make sure they know that they are not the centre of the world by not spending too much one-on-one time with them.
You need to be sure that they understand differences in people. But you should not say anything that can instill preconceived notions.
You need to make sure they have a voice. But they need to know that they are children and should be seen not heard.
They need motivation. But you should also not put too much emphasis on success.
So jip, I just won’t speak to him for the next 16 or so years, I think that way no matter how he turns out it will not be my fault!
(hehehehe, just kidding, have a great day and remember that the only thing you can do 100% right is to love them!)
- See more from Eleanor at justellabella.co.za